Friend Zone

Betheny and Robert

Sunday, 25 July 2021

The Romance

Robert and I met in 2014 through an online dating website called Plenty of Fish. We met in person for our first date but, in my silly ‘he’s too nice for me’ stage, we didn’t really have a second date at the time. Rob continued to be in my life for the next couple of years, being the guy that I vented to about guys that I was dating during this time. Until one day he took a chance again and asked me out on that long awaited second date. We went for dinner and a movie but this time, Rob made it out of the friend zone (something he takes great pride in now!) and we’ve been together ever since. He moved into my place not long after and our chapters began.

Betheny and Robert Jordan   Betheny and Robert Jordan

The Proposal

When we tell this story, everyone that hears says ‘that is such a you moment!’ Our engagement story begun with me winning a competition through a jeweller for an engagement ring. We didn’t really find a ring that suited our style or budget though, but this didn’t stop us. We ended up finding my perfect ring through a different supplier and promptly ordered it. Rob still wanted to choose the time and place we got engaged so when the ring arrived, he tucked it safely away in his wardrobe until the time was right.


This, understandably was torture to me! I knew the ring was there so every dinner and date thereafter was an ‘opportunity’ that it may happen. We had received a lunch cruise gift voucher off my cousin for Christmas so we decided to spend the weekend in Sydney and use the voucher. Of course I thought this was going to be the weekend! I went and got my nails done (because you need to have ‘that photo’ for the gram right?!) and went and chose the perfect outfit. We had the plan that my mum was going to drive me to work that morning then Rob would pick me up after work and we would drive to Sydney from there.


The morning of the trip arrived and Rob set off on his way to work. I did what ANY girl would do in my situation, as much as I tried to tell myself not to, and looked in the cupboard just to make sure Rob had taken the ring with him. Upon opening the cupboard, I found the ring was still there!! I even checked the box just to make sure he hadn’t just taken the ring but it was all still there! I went to work, absolutely devastated that it wasn’t happening this weekend. I even messaged Rob telling him I had a headache and wanted to cancel the room to which he begged me not to.


The whole way to Sydney was short in conversation as was first initial check in to the hotel. I was starting to accept that it wasn’t happening this weekend and told myself not to ruin the weekend and just enjoy it, as we never got to go away much. Rob then tried to convince me to go and have a shower, to which I replied ‘I think I might just go to sleep, I’m pretty tired’. He tried a few more times and I kept declining. Turns out he was trying to get me to have a shower so he could set the room up for the proposal, but this clearly wasn’t happening so he admitted defeat, went to his bag, got out the ring and come over and stood next to me. I was wondering what the hell he was doing but then he nervously spoke those 4 words, ‘will you marry me?’ Of course I said yes!


Turns out he knows me better then myself. He knew I would look in the cupboard so he left the ring planted there and had organised to meet up with my mum later that day to get the ring off her and ask her permission.

The Planning

The planning of our big day was a monumental effort from us. We decided we were going to pay for the whole thing upfront and not get a loan or anything to pay for our wedding. Just after we got engaged, COVID struck and threw a spanner in the works. So much so that two weeks after our engagement party, the first NSW lockdown started. We decided to put planning on hold for awhile as we had already seen some friends have to postpone or even cancel their special days. We ended up buying a house in August, 2020 and not long after, life was starting to be somewhat normal again after lock down.


We visited a few venues but nothing really jumped out at us. It wasn’t until we walked into Mystwood at Wollombi we knew we had found the venue. We initially were only going to have a small wedding but when we walked into Mystwood, we knew we would never be happy not having everyone there with us to share our special day. We set the budget, planned how much we needed to save and by when, and then set out to plan our wedding. We then locked in a date, sent out the invites and started to lock in our vendors. When booking them, we found so many vendors weren’t getting back to us so we decided to go with the ones that were prompt and clear with their communication.

Everything was going smoothly until the day of my hens in late June. My bridesmaids had organised the perfect day for me but on the way home from our wine tour, we heard the news that the first stage of restrictions stemming from the latest COVID outbreak has been introduced and we were only allowed to have a set number of guests in my house which unfortunately cut the festivities short. This then started a month of stress and uncertainty as to whether our day was actually going to go ahead and who would even be able to attend. A lot of Rob’s family are from Queensland as well as parts of mine and some from Sydney.


We got a week out from the wedding and made the call to push through, knowing that our original guest list of 80 had been cut down to 55. This left some room to move financially so we made the call to have a videographer, which originally wasn’t in the budget. This ended up being something we were so grateful we had as it allowed for us to have more memories of our day not only for us, but for all our guests that unfortunately couldn’t make it with travel restrictions.

 

Betheny and Robert Jordan   Betheny and Robert Jordan

The Wedding Day

Finally, our day arrived and nothing could stop it going ahead! I’m usually a stress head but I got to the day and I didn’t have an ounce of stress in me. We were just grateful it was going ahead! This was the only thing both of us were nervous about leading up to the day. I woke up around 3am and just couldn’t get back to sleep as I was so excited.

Hair and makeup artist arrived at 7am to start getting all the girls ready. Everyone kept commenting how calm I seemed, I was even surprising myself! I was getting ready with my two bridesmaids and my mum and the whole morning was so calm and stress free!


Once we were ready, we loaded the car with everything (or so we thought) and headed out to the venue. Once at the venue, we started unpacking my car to find my veil had gone missing. We looked high and low and couldn’t find it anywhere. Even this though didn’t seem to stress me out as I just resolved myself to the fact if I didn’t have a veil, there was nothing I could do to fix it. My mum rang my aunt who was driving past my mum's place, where we were getting ready, and asked if she could check the front of the house to see if it fell out the car. If she couldn’t find it, they had a plan to get my cousins veil from her wedding a few years prior. My Aunt did in fact find my veil flying in the wind in a bush at my mums place. To this day we don’t know how it got there but we have a feeling it was a practical joke from my late father, just to let us know he was around us.

The Ceremony

Our ceremony was an outdoor ceremony in a beautiful location a short walk from our cabin. Being winter, it was quite a cold day and was also quite windy which this ended up working in our favour for photos. We were lucky it wasn’t raining and was actually quite a sunny day! Our wedding arch was beautifully decorated in white and burgundy flowers to match our colour theme. Rob had quite a lot of friends we were unable to include in our wedding party but we wanted to include them somehow, so we decided to have ‘flower dudes’. We had them dancing and throwing rose petals down the aisle to ‘Party Rock Anthem’ by LMFAO and they proved to be an absolute hit. Everyone loved them!


My bridesmaids and myself them entered to ‘Heaven’ by Boyce Avenue, a song that has been a favourite of mine for years. The whole ceremony is a blur to us now so we were so lucky we had a videographer. We chose to have an ‘unplugged’ ceremony as well, as the venue itself had no reception which also was a hit. I had my mother walk me from the cabin to the start of the aisle and my brother took the place of my father, who passed suddenly when I was 19, to walk me down the aisle. My brother was so honoured to have this amazing role for our day, and I wouldn’t have had anyone else with me at that moment


Before we knew it, we were walking back down the aisle to ‘Beautiful Day’ by U2 and we were Mr and Mrs Jordan

 

Betheny and Robert Jordan   Betheny and Robert Jordan

The Reception

Mystwood has its reception and ceremony venue extremely close by so our guest walked from the ceremony straight into the reception while we were off for photos. This is something that was important to us while planning the wedding as we didn’t want guests awkwardly waiting around while we had our photos taken. Our reception kicked off at 5:30/6pm and we entered to Memories by Kid Cudi and David Guetta, another song that we both love. We then immediately cut our cake and sat down to dinner. Dinner was served in a buffet style with each table receiving portions to divide among themselves. We had been to a wedding previously where dinner was served this way and we loved it!


We chose to have our first dance choreographed through Your First Dance Co as we both were nervous about doing our first dance. We completed our dance in 3 lessons and 1 rehearsal at the venue and we are so glad that we did. It gave us the confidence to do a dance in front of our guests without feeling like teenagers awkwardly dancing at a school disco. We also had a bouquet toss, garter throw and in place of a father daughter dance, I danced with my brother to ‘Count On Me’ by Bruno Mars.

The Honeymoon

We had originally planned to go to New Zealand for our honeymoon but, due to COVID, this definitely wasn’t happening. We planned to have a short week away in Port Macquarie which we were so lucky to get as 3 days after returning from our honeymoon, NSW went back into a snap lockdown again. We went on whale watching cruises and bike trails and it was exactly what we needed to wind down after the whirlwind that was wedding planning.

Wedding Advice

Only advice would be to enjoy the planning and your day. Don’t stress as this is only going to make you both feel horrible! Take the day as it comes and if things go wrong, it makes for a great story to laugh at later. Communication with your vendors is key. Tell them what you see in your day and make sure you’re both on the same page. If you don’t understand something, send that email or call them to clarify as, at the end of the day, it’s your day and you need to make sure you can do whatever you can to achieve what you see for your day. Also ,recommended is a list of photos you would like to have taken so you don't miss photos with key people, as the day can get away from you.

 

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