Wedding gifts are always a touchy subject with the impending bride & groom. In fact, this subject just came up a few days ago as relayed to me by an acquaintance.
His friend has a concern about how would it appear to the guests if she & her future husband just requested that they be given money only for wedding gifts (to the value of the gift that was going to be purchased for them).
You see, they are both well established 30-something professionals who have all the normal household trinkets and items that one might expect to get as wedding gifts. What would be the value in them receiving extra toasters, blenders, microwaves and bed linen sets when they already have all these things?
My colleague was remembering that after his marriage, he and his wife had to give away quite a few gifts that were duplicates of items they already had at home, plus some other wedding gifts that they received multiples of, which seems a big waste (not including a horrible statue from some unknown friend of a relative which never saw the light of day thereafter… )
However, with regard to the above-mentioned sticky situation – how to avoid appearing inappropriate or rude to some guests – I recommended that she simply add a small flyer in with the wedding invitation, explaining to guests that she and her husband-to-be would be most grateful if, rather than buying a wedding gift for them, that the guest just gave them money to the same value as the gift the guest would have normally brought. I further suggested she explain the reasons why she & her man wanted this (because they already have all the essentials they need now).
In my opinion, the vast majority of guests to a wedding would be comfortable doing this as long as they understood the reasoning behind it. If you’ve ever been married before or know someone who has, then you’ve probably heard more than a few amusing stories about duplicate wedding gifts, so the chances are your guests will also be understanding about this matter.
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